Tuesday morning I woke up around 3:00 in the morning and could hardly move my arm without feeling an enormous amount of pain. I walked into the bathroom and turned to see my elbow in the mirror and it had become slightly purple and tiny bumps were forming. I couldn’t fall back asleep that night so I waited until about 8:30 in the morning when I called our medical officer and she told me she would send a driver to bring me into town for examination. After meeting with her and being sent to a doctor I found out that I had a cellulitis infection completely surrounding my elbow. My arm had swelled to almost twice the size of my other arm and I had a high fever. They put me on antibiotics and painkillers and told me to take the week off work and hang around this part of town to be checked up on every morning. The doctor seemed to think I was going to be fine but the medical officer was concerned about a possible consequence of having severe swelling for so long in which the fluid turns toxic and can put you into shock.
I’ve basically been sitting around watching movies and keeping my arm elevated in a sling; all this and periodically draining goo from my arm. So much crap has been spilled out of my arm that it would easily have filled a small mason jar. Should bacteria and blood be considered a delicacy somewhere I bet I could have made a small fortune. I’ve decided to spare the juicier of details of bacteria drainage because it has been thoroughly video taped (oh yeah) and I’ll tell you now it will be included in my upcoming video coming soon to a doorstep near you!
This week I’ve been staying with a friend in Apia. My friend lives with this Christian girl from New Zealand who was having some friends from her church over for dinner. I came wandering in wearing a sling and appearing like a stinky unshaven degenerate but I was warmly greeted and well fed either way. The night was looking great until one of the guests played the whole, “are you saved? How is your walk with Christ?” thing on me. I responded, “Its fine I guess but I have a few beefs with Christianity.” The man asked me to name a few and even though I warned him that this would turn into a friendly debate he accepted and we began a conversation that would linger in my head for days. I thought two beefs would be appropriate so I told him that I can’t help but believe in evolution and I think it is terrible how Christians treat homosexuals. The evolution talk was a well rounded conversation. We took turns exchanging points of views and passing the microphone back and forth without ever turning into a heated argument. I had a few points and he had a few also. As debates go I will not turn this entry into a documentation of facts and points but rather admit that I enjoyed pulling my cards onto the table and seeing the cards of a player who does not agree with me. He was baffled how someone could believe in God but yet also believe in evolution but I don’t feel I ever backed myself into a corner of logic and I didn’t act like I knew anything I don’t. I liked talking to him. The problem came when the second topic, homosexuality, was brought up. The man’s wife seemed to have a lot to say about the issue and gradually my opinion of the two of them began to dwindle. This woman knew no sort of logic and rather tossed bizarre statistics around (I’ll go ahead and say it) like it is a proven fact that 9 and a half out of 10 of all homosexuals were sexually abused as a child. I took a moment and a cleansing breath to let that on-the-spot bullshit statistic pass and I said, “fine.. lets go with your proven statistical fact and focus on the other .5 out of 10 homosexuals who weren’t abused but are rather born homosexual.” She farted out of her mouth the same crap that everyone in her position says about how she has all kinds of homosexual friends and they are lovely people but what she was about to say made me so upset that I sat there in silence and stared her in the eyes in complete silence until she shut her mouth and the conversation was over. She actually had the testicular fortitude to tell me that homosexuality is no different than Down syndrome or mental retardation (her exact words) and she knows because she has worked for so long in special education. I sat there with my mouth hanging open and my eyes gazing painfully at her ignorant face.
The conversation was over at this point. I didn’t say another word for the next fifteen minutes until they left. I don’t respond to some things. Sometimes the feces that comes out of people’s mouths is so ridiculous that words aren’t necessary. I just feel sorry. I feel sorry for her and I feel sorry for ever victim in the path of her pathetic two-dimensional ministry.
Now the man originally gained my respect because of the respect he offered me. I think he even realized the illogic of his wife’s foolish comments. I still like the guy but I ran into him the next day and he busted out this document that he insisted I read because it has scientific proof that all evolutionary science is false. I read it. A few of us read it. I proofread it too and gave it some overdue spellchecking. The arguments were ludicrous and often based on one completely unrelated statistic after another. I’m not gonna get too into it. I’d like to run into him and say, “I read it. It’s cute.” Fact is that it was bad logic used on bad science and I would not even waste anymore energy dealing with these people except whatever it takes to show a finger in the center of my fist to that ignorant woman. The sad thing is that I know how these things work and I know that I’m going to become part of his sermon about how he met this lost and confused boy who was hurting and deceived by the evil veil of evolution and homosexuality but thanks to his self righteous intervention he hath shown me the light! ALELUIAH!
Dude, I hope you and your wife read this. I hope you know what a poison you fundamentalist types are to this world. I hope you realize that your people once persecuted and murdered people of the scientific community for claiming that the sun is the center of the universe. Your people get so worked up about science because you are so full of fear. You use awful logic in trying to explain things in which you have absolutely no concept of and worst of all you arrogantly and pompously condemn people as if you were God himself, herself, itself, themselves.
Shame on you.
No comments:
Post a Comment