when i was younger (i can say that now) i had this strange inflated sense of emotionless-ness when it came to saying goodbye to people. i could easily say goodbye to friends and family and not think twice about the next time i would see them. this is not because of a cold heart but out of necessity. before i left for the peace corps i knew that i had to put up walls around my emotions and prepare for the worst long before my departure or i would never make that jump. a few years and a few oceans of swims later this tactic seems to have worn off. i find myself getting very sad when people leave and now more than ever i miss people back home. i also miss people i have come to know in my travels in the past and i only wish that somehow i could thank them for all they have done for me.
i had to say goodbye to another good friend a few days ago. we stayed up until 6am drinking vodka and exposing each other to the far off curiosities of the music from the countries of which we hail. i learned more about spain that night than i have from any other conversation in my life and really it sounds of a quite lovely place to visit. i'll go with no other person, i already have a good friend waiting for me there.
i'll not write more on the subject. i learned when i was in egypt that sadness is like something that will grow inside of you if you let it. it should be recognized, processed and cast away from you otherwise it will consume you. i only want it to be known that i miss and love my friends from all walks of life and such as the cells of my body are transient and ever changing so too i take with me the love my friends have bestowed upon me. i love you guys.
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